I should take this time to say I'm sorry to every one that I haven't been around enough to tell every one I am sorry.
So here goes nothing:
To my fellow roomates at Teft: I am sorry I have not been around and have been worrying you all. I'm sorry that none of you know Don. Im sorry that every time he invited you to hang out and watch movies you declined the offer (I mean some one offering you a chance to get to know more about them is a sign of a bad person).I'm sorry every time I tryed to talk about how happy I was with him I got angry stares and proceeded to be quiet. I'm sorry I like his apartment more then the closet of a room I have now. I'm sorry that I was sick for two days and stayed there because the bathroom was close and no one else had to deal with me being sick. I'm sorry I made you guys worry about my work, I spent 3 days researching for my art history paper and so far have gotten all my assignments in on time. I'm also sorry that Don's 3 roomates are my unnoficial foundation mentors and are helping me through it. In the end, I am sorry these past few days I haven't been around and every one feels like I have abandoned them, I'm getting stuff straight and actually enjoying life. If any one wants to come to Don's appartment to chill I'm sorry to say your invited and will gladly give you his apartment address (don't worry, we stashed all the bodys of our last visitors in the hall closet).
To my friends at home: I am sorry I haven't been online because I managed to get a life and am busy. I'm sorry no one understnds why I broke up with Dan. I'm sorry no one beleives me on my trust issues with Dan (because who would of thought 3 breakups wouldn't have messed me up in the head just a smidge). I am also sorry I keep having to bring up past events. I am sorry i have not called any one/talked to any one online. I am sorry you guys worry about me. I am very sorry you guys think I broke up with Dan because I need a man by my side constantly. I am sorry that your not happy that I'm happy and not worrying about what might happen at home. I am sorry no one saw this coming. I am sorry I was not online for a few days (i dont know if I've said this already). Lastly I am sorry I told none of you what was going on. I admit, life was swirling around me and I was thinking about other things besides you guys and in a way I admit I was wrong to do that.
To Dan: I am sorry I had to end it like this. I am sorry I am very happy with Don and not with you. I am sorry you don't understand me when I say I connect with him more. I'm sorry you don't think I don't know what you're going through. Because waking up the mornin b4 easter on our 3 month anniversary (when things were super) with a break up note in an IM wasn't heart smashing. Oh and I'm sorry when I found out you were after your ex-gf after we talked about living together that my mind was completely fucked. I'm sorry I still hold a grudge against you for what you did and I'm sorry I never baught it up to you and thought it would all go away. I'm sorry I skirted the issue so you wouldn't cry or be sad, because you have no idea what its like to have a fear of confrontation...oh wait...never mind. I'm sorry I am so angry because no one is relising that I don't cry any more, or that I'm getting my work done, and focusing on something that has been blown completely out of proportion. I'm sorry I am having a hard time talking to you. I can't cheer you up, I can't tell you how happy I am, and I can't talk about the days events because you will talk about how you threw up. I'm sorry I have't left you messages on your Im's because every time I have been on a computer was to do some form of research. I'm sorry you can't see how much I have grown, or that I am looking at new horizons. I am even more sorry for still caring about you because if I didn't I could just tell you to fuck off and not care about if you were going to be my friend or not in the end.
In conclusion. I AM HAPPY. I have some one that has been through the exact same things that I have, likes the exact same things that I like, eats the foods that I eat (without me having to bug them because they like it), can give very good advice to every thing and any thing I ask them about, can balance money even when the going are tight, can offer me an open mind to any thing, and can balance every thing in my life. He is not a bad person. If people would stop looking at his height, his body, and the fact he's a football player maybe you might see a normal, inteligent, human being. Not a hulking meat head.
